Aishiteru
by LoveIsWrittenOnMyArms
Summary: She was their best friend, and she moved away. Now, she's their neighbor again, but this time, its on her turf.
1. Atashi Girl

**Aishiteru**

_'I Love You'_

the love story of a loli-japanese girl and a rock star

by livi and emilie

* * *

Joseph Jonas and Nicholas Jonas burst through the doors of their new home, boxes in hand. Joe, as uncoordinated as he was, fell to the ground in a pile of books and papers. The 17 year old boy groaned in pain and shifted. Nick burst out into laughter and set down his own box on a table near the door. He helped Joe up and laughed more.

"Its not funny!" Joe defended.

"Yeah. It is funny." Joe scoffed and picked up his box and put the things back inside.

After a while of unpacking, Joe and Nick sat in a large shared room unpacking boxes.

Joe finished up the box he was working on and threw the empty box to the side, revealing a box labeled 'Joe + Nick, Old' Joe took immediate interest in it. I set the box on his bed and sat down. He opened the box and it exploded in a cloud of smoke, and Joe coughed. Nick looked to Joe and gave him and curious look. Nick wandered over to his brother's bed and sat down. The two boys looked inside to see a mess of things covered in dust. At the top, pulled out a old dusty picture and gasped.

Her.

The picture was of three kids, all around their tweens. Joe at age 13, Nick at 11 and a tiny blonde girl at 10. The girl sat in the middle of the two brunet boys and all three were hugging and smiling at the camera, sitting in the grass under a tree.

The girl had extremely pale skin and strange makeup. She had a small stripe of blue going horizontal on the kick of her nose and atashi markings coming off of her eyes in blue. She had bright red cheeks and nose. A blue Japanese Hello Kitty shirt on and a black pleated skirt and bright blue tights, and no shoes. She had long, almost white blonde hair that hung down past her shoulders to her mid back. Both of the boys looked like totally normal boys, but the girl was intricate.

The three of them seemed to be happier than they had ever been in their lives.

Nick sighed. He showed the picture to Joe and Joe had the same reaction.

"Lilly…" They both said in unison.

--

_Flashback!_

A girl sat in the grass in the park. She was 7. Her name . Lilly was quite different. She had a blue skirt on and a Bjork shirt, converse and pink arm warmers. She had atashi make up on, which anyone would find strange for a 7 year old, but she did in a royal blue shade and red cheeks and a red nose.

She was playing with her dollfie. Dollfies are intricate ball jointed Korean dolls that were very beautiful. Lilly's dollfie was named Toshi. She had shoulder length red hair and was quite beautiful. She was giggling to herself, playing with the dollfie, when she had a ball thrown at her head. She squealed and got knocked down. She started crying.

Then a boy approached her, about 10.

"Oh, I'm so sorry!" he said. Lilly continued crying. He kneeled down to her view and pulled her into a hug. She stopped crying after a few seconds and looked at him.

"Baka na Ja-ku!" She shouted at him. He gave her a confused look.

"What?" He asked, not realizing he was still holding the girl.

"Nihon-jin desu ka?" She asked. Joe gave her another confused look.

"Um… what?"

"You…. America? She asked in broken English. Joe nodded.

"Where are you from?"

"Japan." She said. Joe smiled and nodded. Lilly smiled and grabbed Toshi and showed her to him. "Watashi no desu." She said showing him that she was her's. She then told him her name. "Toshi chan." Joe looked at the dollfie and smiled. She was pretty.

"Her name is Toshi?" He asked. Lilly smiled and nodded. Unfortunate for Lilly, she could understand most English, but couldn't speak more than the basics. Lilly had grown up with her father in Tokyo and then he was relocated to Northern New Jersey, via Wyckoff. "She's pretty." He said.

"O-namae wa nan desu ka?" She asked. Joe could hardly understand what she was trying to ask him, but heard 'name' in the mix.

"Are you asking my name?"

She nodded and muttered; "Hi!" which, is yes in Japanese.

"I'm Joe." Lilly smiled.

"Watashi no namae wa Lilly chan." She introduced herself in Japanese.

"Your name is Lilly?" Lilly nodded, smiling. "So… can you understand English?" Lilly nodded.

"Yes… but… spoken is bad." She stuttered out. Joe nodded. Then, another boy appeared. Joe's brother, Nick, who was only a bit older than Lilly at age 8.

"Joe! Are you coming back?"

"Um… Lilly, this is my brother, Nick." He said looking at her. Lilly smiled at Nick.

"Why is she so quiet?" Nick asked.

"She doesn't speak much English." Joe explained. Lilly nodded. 'She understands it, but can't speak much."

"Oh… where are you from?" Nick asked.

"Japan."

"WHOA!" Nick said. He sat down in the grass next to them. After a few minutes of conversation, Lilly's mother appeared.

"Kite kudasai, Lilly-chan." Lilly's mother insisted for her to come. Lilly nodded and turned to the boys. She leaned in and kissed both of them on the cheek, stood up and took Toshi into her arms. She waved to them and smiled.

"Hajimemashite!" She said good bye to them and ran away, taking her mother's hand and looking back at the boys. She smiled at them.

_End of flash back….  
………………………………..._

Lilly soon turned from a stranger, to Nick and Joe's best friend. She taught them Japanese and they taught her English. They soon became accustomed to her strange ways, and liked her. She easily became part of the family. She was a strange girl who loved playing with her dollfie and pretending she was a cat.

She was always welcome in the Jonas house, mostly because of family problems. Her parents often fought, and when they did, she bunked at the Jonas' house. They had gone through numerous adventures from Lilly's climbing phase to building a tree house, and loved every minute of it.

Lilly had a strange relationship with Kevin, due to the fact that just as Lilly started being friends with Nick and Joe, Kevin was going through a ninja phase where he started watching anime and reading manga and learned Japanese, making it so they could talk and Lilly wouldn't have to speak English. They usually had long conversations about anything they could think of, and in a way, soon became as close as brother and sister. Kevin was very protective of Lilly by then.

Nick recalled once when he asked about her makeup, and why it was so strange, and she responded by saying something in Japanese, then taking out her blue makeup stick and giving all three boys atashi make up similar to her's, but more masculine.

And then Joe happened to pull out the photo of the four of them with blue atashi via Lilly on their faces. They both laughed.

Nick pulled out a piece of notebook paper with words on it. A song, labeled 'Kung Fu Grip' that Joe and Nick knew all too well. The first song they had ever written, and the one nobody but one girl had ever heard. Nick smiled as the memories filled his every waking action. He showed the page to Joe.

"Remember this?" he asked. Joe smiled.

"Oh, that…" He said blissfully reminiscing on the memory of the girl that changed both of their lives. Joe looked it over in his hand and smiled. "First song." He muttered.

"Yeah." Nick said. It was true. This was their real first song. The one that they written when they were 14 and 12. The wrote it the day before Lilly left and gave it to her.

--

_Flashback!_

Lilly walked next door to her best friend's house. She was 11. Her usual atashi make up was smudged and she had been crying. Joe answered the door, the fourteen year old boy not nearly ready for what was waiting for him on the other side. He took one look at Lilly and gasped, and quickly pulled her into his arms.

--

Two days later, Lilly sat on her door step next to her best friends.

"You'll call and write a ton, ok?" Lilly asked the boys.

"Of course! Lilly, you aren't shakin' us." Joe said.

"Lilly! Come on! We should get going!" Lilly's mom said.

"I guess I should get in the car." Lilly said. She stood up and so did the boys.

"Um… Lilly… before you go…" Nick started. He turned to Joe and nudged him. Joe nodded and pulled a small piece of paper out of his pocket.

"We wrote you a song." Joe said.

"You wrote me a song? Really?" Lilly asked. Nick and Joe nodded.

"With lyrics and music and everything." Nick added proudly.

"Aww… guys…" She said. She hugged them both tightly, and smiled. "I'll call you as soon as I get there." She said.

"You better." Nick said laughing. Lilly smiled at them.

"I should get going… Bye guys…" She said. She started to walk away from them.

"Lilly, Wait!" Joe said She turned to them. "Just…don't change… We love you as you are, so don't let California change you."

"Its not going to change me, Joe."

_End of Flashback. _

--

Joe sighed. She told them that her parents had gotten a divorce and her mom wanted to move as far as possible from Mr. Truscott. It was catastrophic for Lilly and made her upset to leave her best friends.

None the less, the boys never heard back from the 11 year old girl of their dreams.

It hadn't quite occurred to them that she might live next door to their new house.

* * *

yes. i'm aware none of you know what 'atashi makeup' is.

check my profile for some pictures.

hey. if you like this story, press the little blue button and soon, you'll get a email saying that there is more!!

psst. joe is 17. nick and lilly and miley and oliver are 15. kevin is 20, kayz?

lawl.

lovezes youz,

livi and emilie


	2. You Don't Even Know

hey there.

its emilie.

don't freak out, Livi's doing ok. she just collapsed this morning, but she woke up, and she's doing ok. she sent me the chapter to work on and i finished it. josh didn't do it cause he's at some anime convention. what a dork. (i'm jealous lol)

um... some news on my behalf. i'm getting tickets for the jonas brothers and avril lavinge show at hershey park on the 25th. anyone going? i'm so effing excited. like... bouncing up and down. i've never been to a jonas show, or a avril show, and they are some of my favorite artists.

also, livi said she's going to the jonas show in saratoga springs, new york, on te second of august so... tell us if your going to either of the shows !

also, i just saw the new camp rock tralier, and i think my heart skipped a beat. i want to kiss joseph so bad. "your music has to be who you really are!' omnomnommnomnomnom...

also, i'm gonna write a bunch of oneshots. i'm gonna try to write myself out of a writers block that livi and i have been somehow sharing, so... meh. mostly loe or nilly. as usual

as for the ship of this story, we still have no idea. loe or nilly or lillyxoc. it depends what you want.

so... yeah. okayz.

bye!!

-emilie.

* * *

Lilly's POV.

I lay in the grass in front of my house, listening to my iPod.

Death Cab for Cutie, 'I Will Possess Your Heart'

I had noticed new neighbors moving in and I wanted to see if they were creepy stalker people So far, I'd seen three teenage boys, all with wavy or extremely curly hair go into the house with a little boy, none of which I'd gotten a close look at. They disappeared after a while.

I smiled to myself.

I would go and say hello.

So, I stood up, brushed myself off and started walking toward the door. I sighed and rung the doorbell. It took a few seconds, but the door soon opened to a tall boy with extremely curly hair who looked around my age.

"Hello…" He said. He seemed distracted, and I heard a bunch of crashing noises from inside. He looked to them and groaned.

"Hi… um… I'm your neighbor. I'm Lilly." I said. The boy looked to me again and nodded. He glanced back inside, then shut the door and came outside.

"Sorry about that… my brothers…. Are… sort of destroying our house…so… eh."

"Right."

"Oh, I'm Nick. Nick Jonas." If I didn't have a better control over myself, I would have flipped out on him right then and there. Not because he's famous, but… he's my best friend. Or, he used to be.

"Nice to meet you, Nick." I said. I couldn't help myself. "So… um… Ok, look, I'm sure you don't rember me, but… about three years ago, there was this girl who lived next door to you…"

"Lilly Truscott. Atashi girl." Nick said smiling. "Do you know her?

"Hilarious, Nicholas. I am her." I said. His eyes widened.

"Lilly!?" He asked. I nodded. He immediately wrapped his arms around me and pulled me into a hug. I giggled. We pulled apart and he looked at me speechless.

"God, what are you losers doing here?" I asked giggling.

"Excuse me. Us losers are famous now!" He said. Ha. Nick. Joe. Famous. Funny.

"No, really. What are you guys doing in SC?"

"SC? Wow… um… but, No. I was serious. We're famous now."

"Pfft. No offence, Nicholas, but what talent could you possibly posses?"

"Uhg. Lilly, we're a band! We have millions of fans! You've really never heard of us?"

"Nope. So, whats the name of this so called band?"

"The Jonas Brothers."

"Oh, so original."

"Ok, Please stop beating me up."

"Nicholas, I haven't touched you since we hugged. I'm not beating you up."

"Whatev." I smiled and looked him over. He was tall. Very tall. He had also grown extremely attractive, and his curls had gotten more like Kevin's.

"So, are you going to let me see your brothers, or should we just take them to the hospital."

"Depends…. We should check." He said. I laughed and he opened the door. I saw a body lying lifeless on the ground. He wasn't dead or unconscious, just completely out of breath. I giggled and walked over to him. Nick followed me. I leaned over Joe's body and pressed my foot into his stomach. He coughed and looked up at me.

"Who…what the?!" He asked. I giggled.

"You really shouldn't be lying on the ground." I stated.

"She's right, Joe. People step on you." Nick added.

"Well, don't step on me." Joe said.

"But the ground is for stepping." I said innocently.

"Well, I'm not ground." He protested.

"No, but your on the ground." He groaned. He moved his hands to my ankle of the foot that was pressing into his chest and tried to move it. I held it down and laughed.

"Who are you, anyway?!"

"Bekarazu kotoyoseru otaku wasuremono ware." I snapped at him, saying 'Don't pretend you ever forgot about me.' He gasped.

"LILLY!?" I smiled. I moved my foot and he stumbled into a standing position. "LILLY!" He said.

"Hello, Joseph." I said. He hugged me tightly.

"Lilly!…. You… aren't wearing your make up…" He said looking disappointed. I sighed.

"Yes, Joseph. I grew out of atashi. You aren't wearing your glasses!" He sighed uncomfortably.

"That's cause he looked like a idiot with his glasses." Nick added.

"Lilly, you aren't the same without your make up." Joe said.

"That isn't true! I'm exactly the same! I just don't look like such a freak." I said.

"Lilly, you never looked like a freak. We loved your make up. You look beautiful with or without it though." Joe said. I blushed.

The one thing that I loved about the Jonas boys (yes. Even Kevin) was that they all had completely open crushes on me. They would say they loved me and that I'm beautiful and I could tell they liked me like that. The said I was amazing. I knew they all loved me. I loved them back, but… I couldn't possibly choose, so I'd just not. I somewhat hoped their crushes hadn't disappeared by now, due to the fact that all three were intensely gorgeous, and I don't have a boyfriend.

"Well, thanks, Joseph, but really. We're in California now. That stuff isn't really as accepted in my school."

"So? Lilly, it wasn't in our old school either, but you did anyway!!" I sighed.

"Joseph, just let it go. I'm different than I was three years ago. I grew up." Then, my phone started ringing. I sighed and held up one finger to Joe for him to hold on.

"Hello?"

"_Lilly, Hi." _Mom.

"Hey, Mom. What's up?"

"_Well, I think we have new neighbors, and I'm still at work, but would you go say hello, and invite them to the barbeque with the Okens??" _I giggled.

"Well, actually, Mom, I'm already over here. And you'll never guess who our neighbors are!"

"_Who?"_

"The Jonas'…" I said in a very excited tone.

"_Oh, really! Lilly, that's great! You must be so excited to see the boys again!"_

"Yeah. I am. Um… I'll tell them, though."

"_Kay, sweetie. Oh, and remember. Robbie and Miles are getting home tonight."_

"Yeah, I know. Tour. Right. I can't wait."

Miley's my stepsister. We're even closer now.

"_Alrighty. Bye!"_

"Bye, Mom." I hung up my phone and looked to Nick and Joe. "You guys are invited to a barbeque with my best friend's family at my house tomorrow night."

"SWEET!" Nick said. I giggled.

"What he means to say is that we'd love to. Our parent's aren't gonna be in town for a few weeks."

"Really? Why?"

"Frankie had to finish up school." I smiled.

"Aww! Frankie! I missed that kid… how old is he now?"

"He's about nine." Nick said.

"Oh, gosh… its been way too long, guys." I said.

"Yes. It has. Much too long." Nick said. "But, we're here now. And we don't ever have to worry about being apart again."

"Yes. Most def. And we have all summer together, right?"

"Yeah! We're here for the whole summer so we can shoot J. O. N. A. S.!!'

"What?"

"Our TV show." Joe said smugly.

"Oh, god. I have to see that."

"Oh, thanks." Nick said.

"Come on, Nicholas! Joseph acting? Hilarious!!"

"Hey! I'm a great actor. I already starred in a movie!!" Joe defended.

"I doubt that."

"I did!! I played Shane Gray in Camp Rock!!" I giggled.

"Isn't that a Disney movie?"

"Yeah, so?" They asked in unison. I shook my head and giggled.

"Boys, Boys, boys… Oh, yeah! Just wait until my step sister meets you. She'll go insane. I'm sure you three are those guys all over her walls."

"Oh, no…" Nick said.

"Oh, yes." I giggled. "I gotta go, guys. But… I'll see you tomorrow night?"

"Yep." Joe said. I giggled. I hugged him. I kissed his cheek in a teasing fashion, then did the same to Nick. They both stared at me in bliss as I walked out, waving good bye.

I love those boys…

* * *

if you didn't notice, lilly only calls nick and joe by their full names, i.e. nicholas and joseph. reason is currently a secret. smiles!

pleassssse review!


	3. Never Ask What It Is

meow.

updating.

review if ya like.

lov yas

emilie

* * *

For the first time in about two years, I had no idea what to wear.

I could usually pick out a cute outfit that worked, but tonight, I was a complete mess.

I heard a knock on the door and Miley appeared. I sighed and sat down on my bed.

"Lils, what's wrong?"

"I can't do this!!"

"Do what? Lilly, its hanging with the neighbors and the Okens. No big deal."

"No. Miley. Seriously. This is them. I can't just… wear anything!"

"Its who?"

"Ok, so… Miles, I should explain something to you before they get here." She nodded and sat down next to me.

"What's wrong?"

"Ok, so… these guys, who are our neighbors…I know them. I used to live next to them. And… Well…"

"What, you like one of them?!"

"Not one. All of them."

"What'd you mean?"

"All three of them have crushes on me. Well, I think Kevin's over his, but… still. That's two hot guys who are amazing who both love me, and I haven't seen them since I was 11!"

"Lilly, calm down."

"I am calm!" She gave me a look and I sighed. "I'm calm. Just… help me find something to wear."

"No prob." She went into my closet and pulled out a pair of denim skinny jeans and a striped top.

I got dressed, did my hair and sighed. I put a small star next to my eye and left it alone. I wasn't going to go full out on my make up. I walked down the hallway to Miley's room and walked inside. I looked around at her walls.

They were littered with my best friend's faces. Nick, Joe and Kevin. They had their own wall. I giggled. I walked up to a picture of them being idiots. I laughed.

"Lils, You like the Jonas brothers?"

"Yes. I do…" I said quietly. "I like em' a lot."

"Cool."

"Yeah." I heard the doorbell. I smiled at Miley.

"Their here!"

"It could be Oliver."

"Yeah… but… oh, I hope its Oliver…" I said. I ran downstairs. I saw the Okens. I smiled.

After a while, Miley, Oliver and I were hanging out back. I heard my mom call for me and I went to her.

"Get the door, hun. I've gotta take out this pie."

"Ok." I said. Butterfiles filled my stomach. I smiled and ran towards the door. I opened it to see Kevin, Nick and Joe standing there. I grinned.

"Oh my god!" I said. "Kevin!" He smiled I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him.

"Lils, you look so different!" He said. I smiled. I pulled them inside and shut the door.

"I suppose. Its been a while. You look different too."

"Yeah, well… last you saw me I was still a dumb kid."

"And now you are?"

"I'm a adult." He said smuggly.

"YEah. Uh huh. Kev, being older than 18 doesn't make you a adult."

"Yeah, whatever." He said.

"So, come on. I want you to meet my friends." I said. I led them into the back.

"Miles, Oliver." I said to get their attention. They both gasped. "These are my very best friends from back in Jersey. Kevin, Nicholas and Joseph." I said. Oliver fainted. Miley squealed. She stood up and looked at them.

"Omigod!! it's the Jonas brothers!! Lilly! Why didn't you tell me you knew the Jonas brothers!?"

"I haven't seen them in almost four years. I didn't know."

"Oh." She said. She looked to them, and screamed again.

"HI!" She said.

After the introductions, and Oliver waking up, and then them all sitting down to talk.

"So, Lils… what have you been up to?" Nick asked. I shrugged.

"Just normal Lilly stuff." Miley answered for me. "Skateboarding. Surfing… beach, School. Mall." She explained. I waited for their reaction. Kevin, Nick and Joe all looked to each other, then burst out laughing. After a minute or two, they stopped and looked to me.

"No, really, Lilly. What have you been up to?" Joe asked. I sighed.

Then in Japanese I said; "Guys stop. She's right. I have been doing those things." they all gave me a confused look. I continued, still in Japanese. "And they don't know anything about my atashi days, so… relax on the subject." They nodded. I looked to Miley and Oliver.

"What was that?!" Oliver asked, looking extremely confused.

"Japanese." Nick said.

"You all speak Japanese?" Miley asked.

"Yes." I said.

"Weird…" Oliver added.

"I lived in Japan from when I was born until I was seven. Of course I know Japanese."

"You did?"

"It was my first language."

"We taught her English." Kevin said.

"Yes. Thus lead to my unfortunate early use of the word pwnd." I glared at the boys. They laughed.

"What can I say? Its just that great of a word." Joe said.

"Yeah, whatever." Lilly said.

"So, Lils. You still going to all those con's? I hear Kazucon is in a few weeks here."

"I was thinking of going. You offering to come?"

"Sure. I'll cosplay as Sasuke. They'll just eat me up."

"Ew." Kevin said.

"Pfft." Joe muttered.

"I wanna go!" Nick said.

"Well… I dunno." I said.

"Why not!?"

"I don't know what you could possibly cosplay as. I can't think of any curly haired characters."

"I could just straighten it. I could go as Sasuke and Joe could go as L. It would work."

"I don't wanna be L! He's all angst and crap! Nick can be Sora"

"And Sasuke isn't?, and I was Sora at Otakon, and it sucked." Nick asked.

"Ok. Nick, You'll go as Sasuke, and Joe shall go as L and I'll be Kairi, as usual."

"Why are you always Kairi? You don't even have red hair."

"I'll just dye it."

"Ok, Hold up. What on earth are you guys talking about?!" Miley asked. I had forgotten they were there. I smiled.

"We're talking about Kazucon. it's a Anime Convention."

"Why would you guys go to that?"

"Cause Lilly's Japanese. She's a atashi girl, even though she doesn't honor it anymore." Nick said, smirking at me.

"I honor it. I'd just rather not be ridiculed for it."

"What's atashi?" Oliver asked.

Joe's POV.

I looked at Lilly and then to Kevin and Nick, and us boys started laughing. Asking that was the one thing that would always piss Lilly off completely. She stood up and stomped off.

"Smooth move." I said to Oliver. He gave me a confused look.

"What'd I do?" He asked. Lilly was gone for a few minutes and she came back with a blue atashi make up stick. Kevin, Nick and I started laughing. Lilly turned to Oliver and held him down.

"Hey, what are you doing!?" Oliver asked

"Just sit still!" Lilly snapped. With a few swift strokes, she pulled away from him and admired her work. She grinned and sat back down in her seat. Oliver looked to Miley confused. Miley just burst out laughing.

"What the hell, Lilly!?" Oliver asked impatiently. Lilly giggled.

"And that's atashi. Well, mine is a bit different, but that's just because I'm a girl."

"Why did you do that?!" Oliver asked.

"You asked what atashi was." I said smirking.

"I was kind of thinking she was gonna explain it!"

"That is her explaining it. We don't even know what it is." Nick said. I nodded.

"And you never will." Lilly stated giggling. I looked over to her and smiled.

"Did you guys know she was gonna do that?!" Oliver asked us. We all laughed, then nodded.

"We know how it feels. God, how old were we…. I think I was about… eleven. Joe was thirteen. Kev, was about 15." Nick said.

"All three of you guys?" Miley asked.

"We have a picture of it." Kevin said.

"You still have pictures of me?!" Lilly asked us, totally surprised. I gave her a confused look.

"Why wouldn't we? Lils, you were our best friend."


	4. Adventures in Secret Identities

meow.

livi's computer crashed.

she sends her love!

new chapter.

sorry bout last one with the anime blast.

i gots carried away.

love ya,

emzee

(emilie)

* * *

Lilly's POV.

The next morning, I walked over to the Jonas' house. I ran upstairs and found Nick's room. I grinned and jumped onto his stomach. He groaned. I sat there for a minute. I bouced up and down for a second. He groaned more.

"Go away, Joe… go back to bed…" He mumbled, shoving his head back into the pillow. I smiled. I lay down next to him and wrapped my arms around his chest. I snuggled closer to him and kissed his cheek. He smiled for a second, but it decreased quickly. His eyes opened and looked to me. He sighed in relief. "Oh my god, Lilly, you scared me…" He said.

"How so?"

"I thought you were Joe…"

"Yeah, that would be creepy."

"Mhmm." He muttered, letting his head fall to the pillow.

"Get up, stud muffin. We're gonna hang today."

"Do I have to?"

"Yes." He groaned and sat up. I smiled.

"Bee are bee." I said as I ran out into the hallway. I found a door and went inside. I saw two beds, Kevin and Joe in them. I smiled. I jumped onto Kevin's bed and jumped up and down. He groaned and looked at me.

"Lilly?!" He asked in a daze. I nodded smiling.

"Get up!" I then jumped from his bed t Joe's. I jumped twice then landed next to him. I pressed my fingertips into his stomach and giggled. His hands shot to his stomach to prevent my tickling. I knew it was his worst ticklish place. I continued to tickle his stomach while he squirmed. He grabbed a hold of my wrists and opened his eyes.

"Lilly. What?" he demanded.

"Get up. We're going on a adventure."

--

Nick's POV.

The adventure consisted of us just hanging out at our house. The four of us were sitting on thr couches watching ANTM. Yes. We were. Shut up.

Lilly was seated right in between Joe and I, snuggled in comfortably. Her head was resting on Joe's shoulder and she had one arm wrapped around my chest. We had our feet up. Kevin was sitting on the armchair laughing at Joe and I drool over Lilly. Who can blame us, though. Really?

Lilly giggled at something that had just happen on the show and I watched her laugh. Suddenly, Lilly's phone went off. She grabbed it and answered.

"Yelo?……. Ooh, hey….. Really? Crap. Ok. I'll be there in a sec." She said. She shut her phone and looked at us. "Guys… I gotta jet." She said. She sat up and look to me. "Family commitment. Important stuff. Love you guys." She kissed all three of our cheeks and ran out the door.

"Well, that was weird." Joe said.

"Yep."

"Majorly." Kevin supplied.

--

Lilly's POV.

I walked backstage. I ran my fingers through my curly wig and sighed. My hair was fitted into a curly black wig with bangs. I smiled.

I saw Miley dressed as Hannah and smiled.

"Oh my god, Lola. You were amazing!" She said. I smiled.

"Thanks." I said quietly. I sighed, still breathing heavily from the concert I just performed. She and I went into the back to my dressing room and I plopped onto the couch.

"SO… how was your day with the boys?" he asked sitting down next to me. I shrugged and smiled.

"It was nice."

"So… My dad told me we have to go on tour soon."

"Uhg… But the guys just got here! I wanna be with my best friends a little…"

"I know. I told him that, but… I dunno. He might make us."

"Uhg…" I groaned and lay down. There was a knock on the door and Roxy appeared. She's my body guard too.

"Girls, there's some boys here to meet you. Your father said to sent them up."

"That's cool, Roxy. Send them in." Miley said. She opened the door further to reveal three tall boys. I gasped.

"Hi. I'm Joe."

"I'm Kevin."

"Sup, I'm Nick."


	5. Nola and Loe?

gah...

hai.

things going on for me:

school ended (yay!/notyay)

indie's here!! (yeah. I actually own a brand new kitten.)

dying hair tonight.

um... love ya, bye!!

emilie

* * *

"I'll be right back." I muttered

I bolted into the bathroom and checked the thick layer of makeup on to make sure my identity was safe from my best friends. I checked my long, curly black wig to make sure none of my platinum hair was seeping from the clips. I nodded and walked back to the boys and Miley. They looked to me.

"Sorry." I said quietly. "I'm Lola. Lola Lufanegle." I said smiling. I shook all their hands and the all stared at me.

"Its such a honor to meet you, Lola. We're huge fans." Joe said grinning at me.

"Thanks. I'm glad to be meeting you too." I said quietly.

"We can't wait to be going on tour with you next week!" Nick said cheerfully.

"We're going on tour together?" I asked, shocked. They nodded. "Great!!" I said smiling nervously.

Shit.

--

Its true. Lola Lufanegle, Hannah Montana, and the Jonas brothers. On tour for three months.

This royally sucks.

Once again, I'm sitting backstage at a Hannah concert. The boys are here. I'm trying to keep them from storming me by reading. Its not working. Nick eyed me and smiled. He began walking toward me and he smiled widly.

"Hey…Lola." He said nervously. I looked up and smiled politely. I kept reading. "Um… can we talk for a second?" He asked.

"Sure." I muttered, setting down my book. He sat down next to me and shifted a few times nervously.

"Um…Lola, I've kind of been thinking about it… and I think your really cool. I mean… your funny, and sweet and really, really beautiful. So… maybe… if you wanted too,…we could go out… sometime. Together. You and me."

"Like… on a date?" I asked, but it came out as more of a statement. I looked at him. I thought for a few seconds. '

Nick dating someone other than me. Nick dating Lola. Not me. It made me upset.

Just the idea of Nick dating someone other than me, was just… frustrating.

Wait a sec.

Oh, god. I'm such a freak. Lola and I are the same person, so why would it be a problem?

I smiled at him. I nodded. I moved a little closer, even though our faces were extremely close already, and grinned.

"I'd love to, Nick."

Ah… I hate using his nickname. His name will always be Nicholas to me.

"Really?!" He asked I nodded. "Um… do you think… maybe…" He asked nervously. I smiled. I leaned towards him and pressed my lips into his. I could feel the corner of his mouth curve upward as he kissed me back. He rested his hand on the back of my neck and pulled me a bit closer to him. We broke and smiled at each other.

Boyfriend.

I like that.

--

**Before we move on, Lemme just make sure you all know that this doesn't at all mean this story is now Nilly. **

**I still haven't decided.  
**

**Ahem. Ok, resume.**

--

I woke smiling the next morning. I officially had a 100 percent accurate boyfriend. A real boyfriend. Who I really liked. And who really liked me.

Perfect. I lay there for a while. It seemed like a few minutes, but… I knew it was a bit more than that. I just kept looking out the window.

Of course, I was taken out of my thoughts by someone sitting on me. I laughed and looked up to see a especially beautiful boy sitting on top of me. Joseph. I giggled. I looked at him. He… looked adorable today. His hair wasn't straightened at all and it was curlier than usual. He was wearing his glasses that made him look adorkable and he looked like he hadn't shaved today. He was wearing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, and converse. Was it just me, or did he look especially beautiful today? He had a wide grin plastered on his face and he started tickling my sides. I giggled and wrapped my arms around his so he couldn't tickle me. He now lay almost on top of me. He laughed and pulled my arms from around him. He sat up and laughed more. I sat up and looked at him.

"Joseph."

"This is payback for you waking me up." He said grinning. I laughed. I glanced at the clock and realized that those dumb 'minutes' I was laying here, they were actual hours. It was 3:50 pm.

"Ok. What can I do for you, Joseph?"

"Well, Lilly, today is our do nothing day." He said.

"Excuse me?"

"Well… Kevin and Nick are dealing with my parents flights and stuff, cause their getting in later, and nobody's gonna be back all day. I saw Miley and her dad leave and your mom went to work and figured that we could spend this dreary day doing nothing together." He explained. I smiled.

"Well, I'd love to." He nodded and lay down next to me.

"So… what do you wanna do?"

"First… lemme take a shower. Then we can go over to your house and watch movies on that big tv of yours."

"it's a plan…" I said giggling. I jumped up and went to the bathroom. I took a quick shower and got dressed in a pleated skirt and a t-shirt. Jeans are to uncomfortable for today. I went downstairs and saw Joe sitting on the ground waiting for me.

"Ready?" He asked. I nodded. He grinned and grabbed me by the waist and pulled me over his shoulder. I giggled uncontrollably and squirmed.

"JOSEPH!" I cried out as he bounced down the stairs. He laughed and stayed mute.

He put me down on the couch in the living room of his house. He then circled the couch and plopped down next to me. I giggled. "So, what should we watch first?" I asked.

"Hmm…. I dunno."

"I have a idea." I said giggling. I ran towards the bookshelf with DVD's and found it. I discreetly pulled it out and put it on. I sat down next to him and he gave me a look.

"What are we watching?"

"For your viewing pleasure…… you."

"What?"

"Camp Rock, dummie." he rolled his eyes in annoyance. He groaned.

"Uhg…. Do we have to?"

"Yes. I've never seen it. I wanna see you dance." He rolled his eyes again and laughed. He put one arm around my shoulders and pulled me closer to him and rested his head against mine. The movie started. It ended in time and I smiled at him. "Ok." I said.

"What did you think?"

"Well… it was pretty accurate to who you are. I mean, I the beginning. There was like… no acting needed." I mocked. He gaped. I giggled. "I'm kidding. It was great. Its weird seeing Nick as such a hard ass, and Kevin so weird and you so… well… acting like a jerk."

"It made me feel bad."

"Course it did, you pansy." I giggled. He laughed. I glanced at my watch and saw the time. 6:32. "I'm hungry."

'Pizza?"

"Sure." I said quietly. He jumped up and grabbed the phone, ordered and then came back.

"Twenty minutes."

"Rad."

"Yep." He said quietly. He looked at me and smiled. "Did I tell you that I missed you?"

"Not really."

"I did. We all did. Even my parents. You were part of our family."

"I'm sorry for not like… keeping in touch. I just… I was kind of ostracized when I first got here. I was such a freak that… I dunno. I kinda had to create a alias of who I was. I sort of forgot."

"I'm sorry we're so forgettable.." He mocked. We both laughed.

"You aren't."

"Neither are you." He smiled. "Lilly, you know, you'll always be my best friend, right?"

"Same here, Joseph." He laughed.

"And you can tell me anything."

Shit…

I should tell him I'm Lola. I…hate lying to them, and we're going on tour soon.

"Yeah. I know." I said smiling. His face dropped to a focused look and he blinked a few times. He leaned toward me and closed his eyes. His lips lightly brushed against mine, and I smiled. I moved up and deepened the kiss. He bit my bottom lip gently as he kissed me deeply. He pulled away and grinned at me. His smiled faded quickly when he realized what he had done. He gasped and sat up.

"Oh my god… Lilly, I'm so sorry…" He muttered nervously. I giggled.

"Joseph. Don't worry…" I trailed off. "But… no. I… I have to tell you something."

"What is it?"

I had to tell him.

"Um… I--"

"WE'RE HOME!!" Joe and I looked to the voice and saw five people coming through the door. Nick, Kevin, Mr. and Mrs. Jonas and a 7year old boy who looked a awful lot like Frankie. They looked at us.

"Oh, hey…" Joe said blushing. I grinned and smiled. I stood up and greeted Nick and Kevin before looking to their parents.

"Boys, who is this?" Mrs. Jonas asked.

"Mom, its Lilly." Kevin said.

"Lilly…" Mr Jonas wondered.

"Lilly Truscott, from Jersey?" I said grinning. "Nice to see you again, Mr. and Mrs. Jonas."

"Oh, Lilly!" Mrs. Jonas cried out. She hugged me. I smiled. She held me arms length and nodded. "Oh, my, you've certainly grown up."

"Yeah, I guess."

"Mom, who's that!?" Frankie asked.

"Frank the tank, my man. You don't remember me?" I asked giggling. I kneeled down to his level and smiled.

"…SILLY LILLY!!" He cried out. I laughed and smiled.

"Yep. Man, your all big now!" I said gesturing to his foot taller body.

"I'm the man." He said making a 'Superman' pose. I laughed. Joe had now joined us.

"How was the flight?"

"Awful. I'm never going to like flying…" Mrs. Jonas said. We all laughed.

I glanced to Joe. He was still blushing from the kiss.

I just cheated on Nick, didn't I?


	6. Pop Goes The Weasel?

hithere.

um... i'm just kind of going to explain this once.

Livi apparently decided to drop off the face of the earth. She's not answering mail or calls or anything. Her computer crashed, and we were talking about this whole situation, but we never made an decisions, but... I'm pretty sure she kind of... gave it up. I realize you guys really liked Livi and stuff, and I'll understand if you don't wanna read my stuff anymore.

i'm sorry she left.

reviews are great.

also...

in case of emergency;

BREAKDANCE.

i lessthanthree you

-emilie

* * *

Day one of tour. I sat in my bunk, my black curls hanging down from my shoulders just barley touching the magazine I was reading. I sighed. I knew for sure this entire tour would be a chaotic nightmare. Nick and Lola were going out. Joe kissed Lilly. So, if I tell them, they'll find out and get mad. If I don't, it will make them madder when they do find out.

So, I'm screwed.

I sat up and sighed. I jumped down from the bunk. I walked out to the main part of the bus and looked out the window. We were at a pit stop. Oh, thanks for telling me, Miles.

I walked outside and saw Miley standing with the boys talking. Miley saw me and came in front of me a few feet from where the boys were.

"Hey." I said.

"Lola… I thought you were asleep… I'm sorry." She said mercifully. I shrugged.

"Its ok. I wasn't, though. Just reading."

"I was gonna get you something for when you woke up…"

"Hannah. Its fine. Don't worry." She nodded. We both approached the boys.

"Hi, Lola." Nick said smiling. Joe looked to him and groaned.

"Come on, guys. Let's let them be alone." he said. He gestured his hand and Kevin and Miley followed him.

I smiled at Nick.

"How was the ride here?"

"Good. How bout you?"

"Good." He muttered, staring at me. He stepped closer to me. He took my hands and smiled. I sighed, then smiled. "So… remember the other day…that thing we did…"

"Oh you mean…" I said teasingly leaning my head even closer to his and barley brushing my lips against his. He bit his bottom lip and smiled in pain.

"Mmmhmm." He moaned. I grinned. I kissed him full on. He rested his hands and mine to my waist and pulled me closer to him. I broke the kiss and smiled.

"I'm hungry." I stated. I let go of his hands and skipped toward the diner we stopped at. He laughed.

--

Our first show went well. Lots of fun. Now we're stopping at a radio station for a appearance.

"Alright, so I've got a packed house for you guys, I'm here with Hannah Montana, the Jonas Brothers and Lola Lufanegle!!" the DJ said. We all laughed.

"Sup."

"Hey."

"Hello…"

"Alrighty, then… Now, you five are on tour togther, correct?"

"Yeppers. The boys are opening for Lola and I." Miley said smiling.

"Mhmm. it's a little weird when your opening act is as huge as them, but… it really just makes it a that much greater show." I said.

"And, boys, how are you guys doing on the road with the girls?"

"Amazing. We've had one show so far, our tour officially started in Phoenix yesterday… and so far, its just… amazing." Kevin said.

"What do you think is different about touring with Hannah and Lola than your own tours?"

"Um…. Well, the thing is with Lola, she's a kind of edgier sound, and she's got a large group of guy fans, and I know,… we've been on tour with Hannah once before, but… I really, really noticed last night that we met a lot of guys. Its not that common for us." Nick said.

"Oh, thanks. I'm sorry your purist ways are ruined by my fans." I said laughing.

"No purist… its just… talking to guys on tour is awkward when its just us. I dunno. I know, I'm not used to it." Nick said.

"Gah. Stop ganging up on me." I said. We all laughed.

--

Joe, Nick, Miley and Kevin and I sat on the tour bus. Joe and Nick were bickering about something and Miley and I just laughed. Kevin looked embarrassed.

"THERE IS NO WAY YOUR STRONGER, NICK" Joe screeched.

--

Miley and I danced around the bus. My wig was sitting on the couch. Miley had her's on. We belted out the words to a bunch of Fall Out Boy songs.

"We're going' down, down…in a earlier round… Sugar, we're going down swinging."

"What the--" I heard someone say. Miley and I spun around to see Kevin standing there, his jaw on the ground.

"Oh my god, Kevin…" I yelped. He stared at me for a second.

"Lilly?!" He yelled.

"Um…. Hi?" I mumbled innocently. He looked mad now.

"Lilly, what are you doing here!?"

"Look, Kev… its… its not what you think, I swear! I was just… um… I was gonna tell you… but…"

"Wait… what?!" he asked. Shit. "Lilly, why are you dressed like Lola?!" I sighed and grabbed my wig. I held it up.

"Cause when I put this on, I am Lola…"

"What?" he yelped. I grabbed his hand and sighed. I sat him down and slipped my wig over my blonde hair and sat down in front of him.

"Kevin, please… I swear I was gonna tell you soon, I just… wanted to wait for the right moment… and… it didn't really come." He fell silent for a second. He looked up at me.

"We're like family, Lilly. How could you keep something this big from us?!" He asked. I sighed.

"It was just… you guys moved here, and then,… I dunno. You just showed up at the concert, and said we were going on tour, and… I didn't have a chance. I mean,… its not like 'Oh, yeah, I forgot to tell you that I have a secret identity and I'm this huge popstar' comes up in normal conversation."

"Well… that I can understand, but…" He thought for a second. "So, there is no Lola?"

"Nope."

"Have you told Joe or Nick?"

"Nope."

"Are you going to?"

"Nope."

"Lilly."

"Kevin."

"Lillian."

"Paul!" I said giggling.

"Stop. This is serious, Lils. You have to tell them! Especially Nick, I mean… he is your boyfriend."

"Yeah, And Joe! He's your… whatever you wanna call you two." Miley said, Not helping. I glared at her.

"What happened with Joe?!" Kevin asked protectively.

"He… kissed me." I muttered.

"WHAT!? WHEN!? I'll kill him, I swear! I can't believe he did that!" Kevin fumed.

"Kevin. No. No. It was my fault. I mean… it was like… the day after Nick and I--"

"It was during Nick and Lola's relationship!?"

"Yeah, but… it was as Lilly… so, he didn't know. He wouldn't have if he knew I was dating Nick."

"But… I mean, you told him off didn't you?"

"Well…"

"You didn't?!"

'Not exactly… it kind of resulted in Joe and I… making out…" I frowned and waited for his reaction.

"Lillllyyyyyy." He whined. "I thought you were over this!" He groaned and ran his hand through his hair in frustraition.

"Over what?!" Miley asked grinning.

"This dumb crush thing. She's been teasing us since we met her. She would kiss our cheeks and hold our hands and practically treat the three of us like boyfriends, all at the same time." Kevin explained. "She drove us insane."

"Lilly! Oh, god, your such a slut!" Miley said jokingly.

"No… it wasn't like that… I just… I liked all three of you, so… I just… I dunno. Its how I treated boys then. Oliver went through it for about a year too."

"Lilly. It was like that. You did it on purpose. You were manipulative in the sweetest and evilest way. Even I had a crush on you back then! Do you realize how like... illegal that is!?" Kevin exclaimed.

"Oh, shush."

"Thankfully I got over it, but… honestly."

"So, you guys never went throught the cooties thing, did you?" Miley asked.

"Lilly said that because she was Japanese, she didn't have them." Kevin mocked me. I laughed.

"Oh, yeah… well, you guys were kind of my only friends. I wasn't gonna let that happen."

"Hey, what about all of your girl friends? Mandy and Tiff and Maya?"

"Well… I was closest to you guys. Besides… you guys were cooler, anyway." I sighed. There was a knock on the door.

"Hey… you guys coming?" Joe's voice asked.

"Just a second!" Miley yelped. I looked to Kevin and smiled nervously.

"You aren't going to tell, anyone… are you?" I asked franticly. He stood up.

"Well… no. But… Lilly, you have to tell Nick. Atleast Nick. He's your boyfriend, right?" I nodded.

"So, he deserves to know."


	7. An Ice Cream Run Gone Wrong

I'm sorry this is so short, but the next chapter is my favorite.

I'm re posting Eternity. i think.

You guys should check out some of my new stories.

About You Now.

Which, is my current favorite to write.

:) smiles.

-emilie

PS.

Anna, Cayce, Deni...

eight inch bulge...

* * *

--

Miley and I were sitting in our dressing room backstage at our next show. Joe appeared at the door, and I was thankful that Miley made me put on my wig on early. Joe walked toward me and smiled.

"Lola, can I talk to you alone for a sec?" He asked. I nodded and folled him out to the backstage part. He looked at me nervously.

"What's up, Joe?" I asked. He shifted nervously and looked me.

"Um…. So…. You're a girl, you know..." He said nervously.

"Yes, Joseph. I'm a girl. Unless your implying that Nick is gay." Joe sighed and shook his head.

"No… I mean. Can I ask you advice on something?"

"…You know that I like boys, right? I'm pretty sure that your straight aswell…"

"On a girl. Since you're a girl, you'll know what to do. What girls like, since you know, you are one!" Joe said. I sighed and put my hands on his shoulders.

"Joseph. What do you need?"

"Ok. So….there's this girl…" He started. "And… I really, really like her."

"What's her name?" I asked, smiling.

"Lilly." I didn't gasp. I would have, but… well.

"Ok."

"And… I dunno. I threw a basketball on her head when she was four, and we were best friends since then, and then she moved away, and then we moved here, and you know what? She lives next door to us now."

"Wow. What an ironic situation!" I said, trying to act surprised.

"Yeah. I know! And… I dunno. But… like… a few days before the tour started, she and I were hanging out alone at my house… and… we… We kissed."

"Ohhh…." I said nodding.

"And then… I don't know. We just… We never talked about it, and I don't know if we're going out, or what. And I tried calling her cell phone, but her mom said she lost it."

"Hmm…." I said quietly. "Well, I dunno. You should probably wait until you get home."

"I know… but… wow. I mean… she's really amazing. You'd like her. You guys have a lot in common."

More than you think, Joey.

--

Nick's POV.

Joe, Hannah and I were sitting, waiting for Kevin and Lola to get back with ice cream. They had went on a ice cream run from the hotel room. I was laying on my bed in Joe and my hotel room as Hannah and Joe were dancing around to Fergie.

Suddenly, my cell phone went off. I grabbed it and looked. Mom. I sighed and shrugged. I pressed the iPhone and held it to my ear, quickly telling Joe to turn down the music. He did.

"Mom?" I said quietly.

"Nicholas…." She said. She sounded like she was crying,. "I need you and Joe and Hannah to get down to the hospital right now." She sniffled.

"Mom, what's going on? Is Dad ok?"

"Yes… no… its Kevin. And Lola. They… um…." She sounded like she was about to start sobbing.

"Its ok Mom. We'll be there soon. I love you." I hung up and looked to Joe and Hannah.

"What's going on, Nick?"

* * *

omg...omg...omg...omg...omg...omg...omg...omg...omg...omg...omg...omg.


	8. Curls

Meow. I won't hold you up with this chapter.

* * *

Joe, Hannah and I ran down the hall of the ICU. I saw my mom standing there, arguing with a nurse.

"I'm sorry, Ms. Jonas. You aren't related to her. We can't release medical information to non-relatives." The woman said.

"But, her parents aren't here!" My mom cried out.

"Can we see her?" I asked quietly. The nurse and my mom turned to me. The nurse smiled.

"Yes. She's just out of surgery, but still unconscious. You can see her." She said. I nodded.

"Can I?" I asked. She nodded and started walking down the hall. Joe stopped me.

"Do you want me to come?"

"No… its ok. I… I have to do this alone." He nodded. I followed the nurse down the hall. She approached a room and lead me inside. I saw a blonde girl laying in the bed. She had cuts and scrapes all over her face and body. I looked to the nurse.

"This is Lola Lufanegle?" I asked, confused.

"Yes." The nurse said quietly. She grabbed a blob of black from the night stand and handed it to me. "She was wearing this." The nurse said quietly. I nodded and she disappeared. I looked at the blob closely. It was a black, curly wig. Just like Lola's hair. I looked at the girl in the bed, and saw something I'd never have expected to see.

Lilly Truscott.

It made sense. Lilly was Lola.

"Why would you keep this from us?" I whispered. I pulled the seat that was near me closer and sat down. I took her hand and rested my head on the edge of her bed. All I could do was sit for hours. I fell asleep.

I woke to someone tugging at my hand. I looked up to see Lilly looking at me confused.

"Nick?" She whispered quietly. I smiled lightly at her.

"Hey…" I whispered.

"What's going on? What am I doing here?"

"I don't know exactly….but… Kevin's not doing to well."

"Oh my god… the ice cream…" She whispered. I nodded. Suddenly, her hand shot to her head and she closed her eyes. "My… wig." She whispered. I grabbed it from the floor where it had fallen and set it on her lap. She looked to me with sorrowful eyes.

"Nick… I…"

"Its ok. We can talk about it later. You should rest." I said quietly, squeezing her hand. She nodded and her head fell back. She gave me a tired look.

"I'm sorry, Nick." she whispered. I shrugged.

"its ok. Just… breath. Just breath. We don't need to talk about it now." I said quietly. She nodded and I rested my elbows on the side of her bed.

"How are you feeling?" I asked. She shrugged.

'Like I've been hit by a bus."

"No offense, but from what the doctor told us, you practically were."

"Great.." Suddenly, she sat up and looked at me worried. "Wait… how's Kevin?" She asked.

"I don't think he's doing to good." I said quietly. Lilly sighed and fell back into her pillows.

"Oh my god… no…" She whispered. I moved closer to her.

"Lilly…" She didn't move. "Lilly." She looked at me. "Do you remember when I was ten, and Joe pushed me out of the tree house and ended up falling too?"

"Yeah… two broken arms."

"Yeah. And do you remember what you did?" She smiled weakly.

"I brought you guys Rita's." She said quietly. I nodded. "But… aren't we in like… New Hampshire or something?" I smiled and nodded.

"When we get there, We'll get some. But, In the mean time…" I stood up and went toward the paper bag that Hannah dropped off. I grabbed it and smiled at Lilly. I opened the bag and pulled out a pint of sugar free cotton candy Ben and Jerry's ice cream and two. She started laughing. I handed her a spoon and opened the ice cream.

"I probably shouldn't have this…" She said quietly.

"Lilly." I said sternly. She shrugged and her spoon dove into the pink and blue mixture. She looked at me and sighed.

"Nick, do you hate me?" She asked in a quiet voice.

"Why would I hate you?"

"For being Lola."

"No… no… its ok, I get it. You didn't want to be famous 100 percent of the time, but…I kinda wish that you would have told me sooner. I'd like to know that I'm dating my best friend." I looked up at her and smiled. She smiled sweetly at me.

"But…. I mean…do you still want to… you know." She asked quietly. I shrugged.

"Be boyfriend and girlfriend? Of course… " Her face brightened and she smiled.

"Really? I thought…"

"You thought wrong. I'm just glad that Lilly didn't have a boyfriend, or else we'd approach a problem." I said smiling. Lilly let out a nervous laugh and she nodded, and took a huge spoonful of ice cream. I stared at her nervously.

"Lilly… you don't have a boyfriend, right?"

"Well…." She said quietly. I sighed. Suddenly, Joe appeared at the door and looked at me.

"Nick, Mom and I are…" He trailed off as he looked at Lilly. His eyes widened and he rushed to the side of her bed. "Lilly, what are you doing here?!"

"I was hit by a bus apparently." She said quietly.

"But…. Why are you…." Joe confused himself. I sighed and held up her wig.

"She's on tour with us, loser." I said bluntly. Joe looked to it, and then to Lilly. He sighed. He looked annoyed now.

"That's so lame, Lilly." He spat at her, and he stormed out of the room. I looked to Lilly. She looked sincerely heartbroken.

"What was that?" I asked, annoyed.

"Nick… just… I…. I'm sorry… I just…Joe and I….we…"

"Wait…. Lilly's boyfriend is JOE!?" I asked harshly, standing up. She sighed and shook her head.

"Well…not exactly…. We just kissed…but…"

"You kissed? That's it?"

"Well…. It… it was kinda after we got together, but… he kissed me… and that was it." She said quickly.

"Lilly… I… I don't know…" I said quietly.

I honestly didn't know what to think.

--

Lilly's POV.

I lay in the hospital bed, out of it. I stared out the window.

I had just lost my two best friends.

* * *

meow. Whoa!

don't worry.

i still haven't' decided about loe or nilly yet.

review pleeeeeease.


	9. Talk It Out

Happy 4th of July for the Yanks.

Happy Thursday for everyone else!

-Emilie

* * *

_--_

_Lilly's POV. _

_I lay in the hospital bed, out of it. I stared out the window. _

_I had just lost my two best friends_.

--

Miley stopped in to see me a day later. She said something about them not letting her or something for a while.

"Lilly, what happened?" She asked, taking a seat next to her. I sighed and honestly felt like I was going to cry.

"Miley… everything just fell apart…" I whispered, and immediately burst into tears. She hugged me tightly and comforted me quietly.

The next few days were a silent and painful. Miley often came to visit, but other than that, I was lonely most of the time. I missed everyone. It might not have been so bad if she was home, but, with everything going the way it was.

And I was getting worse apparently. The doctors said that the injuries I sustained from the hit weren't getting much better, and that I was developing a post trauma disorder.

They let me visit Kevin about a week later.

I walked into his room. It was thankfully empty. I tried to visit when nobody was there.

Kevin was awake, but sleeping. I sat down next to him and sighed. His dormant expression practically mocked me. He looked like Kevin. Like my best friend. Like my older brother. My hero. And it was my fault he was like this.

I took his hand into mind and gently held it for a second. I saw him stir, and his eyes opened ever so slightly and looked at me. He smiled.

"I was wondering when you'd be coming around." He whispered. I smiled weakly at him.

"How are you feeling?" I asked quietly." He shrugged.

"You?"

"The same."

"Nick told me about what happened."

"Yeah…"

"I wasn't quite… fully conscious when he did, or I would have told him off… but… you know. Don't worry about them, Lilly." He said quietly. I shook my head.

"They… they hate me, Kev…"

"They'll get over it. Don't worry."

"No… Kevin, you should have seen his face. Joe… he… I don't know." I looked up at him quietly. "I lost the two guys who I could have been in love with."

"No. Don't do that to yourself. Nick and Joe are jerks anyway…"

"I'm the jerk."

"No, you aren't. They both overreacted."

"Kevin, stop. I was with Nick, and I lied to him about who I was, then I cheated on him with Joe, and still lied about who I was. I screwed up." I said bitterly. Kevin sighed and sat up. He looked at me.

"Yeah, Lilly. You did screw up. It doesn't mean that you didn't mean well. It was a stupid secret that messed everything up."

"I just… their both so… I dunno. I mean… when I was younger, I never actually liked any of you guys, but the whole…. boy-toy-holding-hands-and-kissing thing was what we did in Japan, and I was used to it. You guys didn't seem to mind, so I didn't really care. But now… I mean… Joe's all… tall and sweet and Nick's just amazing and It kind of comes down to the fact, that I think I'm totally infatuated with the both of them."

"Well, then you have a problem."

"Precisely." I said quietly and he nodded.

"Did you ever think that maybe… just maybe, neither of them are right for you?"

"Never. Their both just…. Perfect. Its almost daunting. Both of them, I would probably totally happy with, but… then the other would be upset. And then… yeah."

Kevin nodded.

"Well… when your with either of them, which one do you feel like you can tell anything to?" I thougth for a second.

"Joe, I guess. I always felt like I could trust him with stuff." Kevin nodded again.

"Which one do you always want to hold your hand?" I gave him a confused look.

"…Well…. I guess… Nick." I said quietly.

"Lilly… you know what that means, right?"


	10. Why Would You Lock Nick In The Bathroom?

The tour was supposedly being post-poned because of Kevin and I. When we got realeased, the next show was a day later. I hadn't spoken to Nick or Joe. Kevin said he'd talk to them.

I was sitting in my bunk, staring at the ceiling. I wasn't going to lose the only guy to ever make me so happy.

I jumped out and looked out the window. We were stopped. I sighed and walked outside. I went on the Jonas' bus and saw the boys sitting there. Joe gave me a glare, Kevin gave me a worring look. Nick gave me an upset look.

"Can we help you?" Joe said in a very standoffish voice.

"Can I talk to you guys?" I asked in a quiet voice. Nick looked to Joe, and they both nodded. I sighed and thought for a second, then spoke again.

"I just…. I wanted to apologize." I said quietly. "For… keeping it from you. I just… I was gonna tell you on the first day of the tour. I was… but… then… I dunno. I just… couldn't. And everything was fine… its just… everything got messed up."

"You can say that again." Joe said quietly. I bit my lip quietly and sighed.

"I'm not good with relationships." I whispered. "You guys know that. And… I can understand if you both hate me… and I'll understand if you guys never want to talk to me again, I just… I never wanted to hurt you. You guys have always meant so much to me, and… I would hate to lose you over something like this… but… I guess I already have." I sighed and stood up. "I'm just…. I'm sorry." I started walking towards the door. Suddenly, I felt my hand being pulled. I looked. Joe and Nick were standing there, Nick holding my hand.

"Lilly, your our best friend. We don't want to lose you either." Joe said. I smiled weakly at them. Nick wrapped his arms around me. I sighed and hugged him back. Once Nick let go, I hugged Joe.

Maybe things would be ok now.

--

Kevin and I walked toward Joe, his and Nick's hotel room which was down the hall from mine. Kevin and I had been writing and hanging out for a while, while Nick and Joe did school work. Kevin knocked on the door. Joe answered and let us in. He jumped back on the bed and stared back at the TV, displaying an episode of Spongebob.

"Joe, where's Nick?"

"Bathroom." Joe said absentmindedly. Kevin knocked on the door of the bathroom. No answer. He knocked harder. Still no answer. He tried the door, only to find it locked.

"Joe, why is this locked?"

"Cause Nick was being annoying."

"You locked him in!?" I yelped. Joe shrugged and threw Kevin a key. Kevin quickly unlocked the door. He opened it and looked inside. He and I looked around the gigantic bathroom for a minute, until I saw a figure lying in the bathtub. I walked toward it, to see Nick, not moving. I nudged him and he didn't stir. I looked at Kevin, who frowned worriedly.

"Oh my god…" He mumbled. He turned Nick over, only to see a small white pod sticking out of his arm with a flashing light. His eyes widened and he ran out to Joe.

"JOE, WHAT THE HELL!? HIS OMNIPOD IS EMPTY! CALL AN ABULENCE!!" I heard Kevin yell. I looked at Nick. Kevin came back and tried to pick Nick up.

"Kevin… wha--whats wrong wit nick?"

"His omnipod is empty. He's probably almost in a coma…" Kevin mumbled as he continued to pull at Nick.

"His what? Why would he be in a coma?" Kevin looked up at me, then realized something, and gave me a careful look.

"…Lilly…. Nick has diabetes. He wears an omnipod so he doesn't have to take shots… but, when it runs out, he has to change it up. My guess is that it ran out. If he doesn't have more insulin soon… he'll fall into a coma…" Kevin explained.

"Wha… When did Nick get diabetes?"

* * *

This is rather short.

I dunno.

I've felt very un-insipired lately.

Blehhhhh...

Reviewwwwwwplease.

lessthanthree

-Emilie


	11. I Love Living Life With You By My Side

Worried.

Disapointed.

Confused.

Hurt.

Worried.

These were things I felt sitting in the waiting room of the ER next to Kevin. Joe held my hand gently. I squeezed it every once and a while when I felt like I was going to start crying. Joe wasn't doing to well either, but I could tell that he wanted to stay strong for me. I just help looking down at my shoes. Joe looked to me and wrapped one arm around my shoulders. He rubbed my arm soothingly to calm me down.

"He'll be ok. He's been through this before, and he always pulls out of it." I could tell he wasn't believing his own words. I shook my head and leaned into his chest.

"He… I…" I stuttered. Joe pulled me closer to him and hugged me tight. "I just… I'm so worried…"

"I know. We all are, but we gotta be strong for Nick. We gotta make sure that when he wakes up, we can be strong for him." Joe said. I looked up at him and nodded. Suddenly, Kevin appeared at the door with a pale look.

"What'd they say?" Joe asked.

"He's gonna be ok. He didn't get to far into it, so they were able to pull him out quick. Lucky for you, we found him fast enough." Kevin said, glaring at Joe.

"I said I was sorry!!" Joe whined now looking really annoyed.

"Joe, You know never to lock Nick in places! That was the first rule when we started dealing with this!"

"I'M SORRY OK, HE WAS GETTING ANNOYING. RAMBLING ON AND ON AND ON ABOUT LILLY AND SHIT, AND I JUST COULDN'T DEAL WITH IT! YOU KNOW HOW--" Joe suddenly stopped himself. He stood up and shook his head. He walked out. I looked to Kevin. He sighed.

"Joe'll be fine…" He said sitting down next to me. "…He just… He isn't quite over you just yet. It'll be fine. We'll just find Joe a girlfriend, and everything will be fine." I nodded. "YOu wanna come see Nick?"

"Is he awake?"

"Yeah." Kevin said quietly. I nodded, and we both stood up. I followed Kevin to a room down the hall. Nick was staring out the window. He looked to us and smiled weakly.

"Hey…" he said quietly. I smiled. I walked to his side and sat down on the side of his bed.

"Since when do you have diabetes?" I asked seriously.

"November fifteenth, 2006." Nick said quietly. My jaw dropped.

"Seriously?" Nick nodded.

"Yeah." He murmered. I nodded. I pulled my legs up and sat Indian style. I took his hand and smiled.

"You should have seen Joe. He was being really brave for you. I was a mess, and Joe just kept it together." Nick nodded.

"Joe's the strong one. He's good at this stuff. I don't think I've ever seen him cry." NIck said quietly. "I mean… As immature as Joe can be at times, he does know when to just… keep it together." I nodded. We were both kind of quiet for a few minutes, then Nick took my hand.

"Lilly… um… you know all that stuff… with us…" I nodded. "Do you think we can… you know…"

"Be… together still?" He nodded. I smiled. I waved my hand for him to scooch over and he did. I lay next to him and kissed his cheek. He and I lay on our sides and looked at each other. I kissed him full on for a few seconds and smiled at him.

"So… I take this as a yes?" He said, raising one eyebrow. I smiled and nodded. He wrapped one non-IV arm around me and pulled me closer to him.

I pretended to fall asleep there. I honestly didn't want to leave Nick's side, no matter what happened. Because for as long as we were lying there, neither of us had any problems, or upsets or anything bad. And that was exactly what I wanted. I couldn't possibly actually fall asleep.

My mind was racing with thoughts of the coming days, or even weeks that I could be spending with Nick, and how happy he made me. So, when Kevin came back with his parents, Nick told them I was sleeping, and then when Kevin went to pick me up to take me back to the hotel for the night, Nick told him that I was fine, and that he wanted me there. It took a few minutes to convince Kevin not to take me, but once he realized that Nick was somewhat responsible enough not to rape me in my 'sleep' or whatever he thought Nick and I would do while they were gone, he left.

I'm pretty sure that Nick didn't fall asleep that night. For the most part, he knew that I had pretended to be asleep to stay with him, because whenever he would kiss me or hold my hand or stroke my hair, I'd always smile, and I knew he noticed it.

I fell asleep finally for real after about three hours of pretending, and when I did so, Nick was awake, and when I woke up the next morning, Nick was awake. It was incredibly early, even still dark out when I did wake up.

Nick was lying there, staring outside. I moved a bit closer to him and he looked to me. He smiled warmly and tightened his grip securely.

"Hey…" I whispered.

"Hey…" He replied. That was all we said. It was all that we needed to say.

* * *

I won't be around for a few days cause I'm going out of town.

MY NEW FAVORITE BAND IS BACKSEAT GOODBYE.

(OMIEGOD, THANK YOU SO MUCH, CAYCE!!)

You all need to go download it. Right now. And listen to Technicolor Eyes, and you'll know everything you'll ever need to know about me.

I'm not even joking.

Also... Chuck Prophet is amazing.

And Ben Kweller, but thats a standing favorite.

So, Artist That You All Need To Go Look Up Right Now;

Backseat Goodbye  
Chuck Prophet  
Ben Kweller  
Brooke Fraser  
Anna Nalick  
War On Drugs _(Because their so amazingly indie, despite the scarinesses of their name.)_

Alrighty?

Kay. Bai!!

Lessthanthreeeee

-Emilie


	12. I Missed You

Pssh, yeah.

HEY!!

Um, yeah. So, updatin'. And what not. I got the Jonas' new single at exactly 12:00 last night, and I think I might have been one of the first to get it. I was listening before 12:01, so, yeah. I loved the song, and I cannot wait until August 12th!!,... or... the 17th when I get home from Essex to actually listen to it.

Hope you guys liked the DC Games. I saw quite a few bulges as well, Anna. Tehehe. Haha...Wow, that turned into some shout outs. Ha! Um... well, go to my profile and check out my favorite stories. Read them, cause they're all awesome. Oh, lordy, I'm done plugging now.

**This is torn up from the floor up.**

Bahaha.

Ok, I'm gonna let you read the update now, and I'm gonna stop embarassing myself.

Oh, and reading my new story 'Fading, Falling, Forgetting' would be amazing.

PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE REVIEW!!

-Emilie

P.S. This is short. I'm sorry!!

* * *

Six of us were sitting in the boy's tour bus. I was on the couch, sitting Indian style next to Nick, who was sprawled across the rest of it with his head in my lap. Kevin and Miley were sitting on the other couch next to Frankie, and Joe was lying on the floor.

"Where are we going again?" Joe asked.

"Umm…"Kevin started. He stood up and grabbed the schedule. He looked it over quietly, then at us. "Wyckoff..." Everyone froze.

"Wyckoff?!"

--

The bus stopped at the hotel, and instead of everyone going up to their rooms, Kevin got a car, and everyone got in. We drove as fast as possible to the small neighborhood in Wyckoff, where the boys and I grew up.

We approached my dad's house and Kevin stopped the car. He looked back at me and smiled.

"Go see him."

"Who?" Miley asked.

"That's my dad's house." I said quietly. She nodded. I looked up at it nervously. Nick took my hand and squeezed it. He looked at me seriously.

"Do you want me to come?" he asked quietly. I nodded, smiling slightly. He nodded, and opened the door, still holding my hand. He helped me out and we looked up at the house. I sighed, and we both walked toward the door. I looked at the door and sighed. Nick gave my hand a soft squeese for support, and I rung the doorbell. The door opened, and my hand involuntarily dropped Nick's. There stood my father, older, but exactly the same. He gave me a questioning look, ignoring Nick, who had stepped to the side.

"Can I help you with something?" He asked. I sighed and smiled weakly.

"Hi, Dad." I whispered. He gasped.

"Anata ga i naku te sabishii desu…." He whispered, pulling me into a tight hug. He said he missed me. I hugged him back for a while. I smiled at him and looked to his worn blue eyes.

"I missed you too, Daddy." I said quietly. He smiled. I smiled and glance to Nick. I pulled away from my dad. "You remember Nick, right?"

"Yes, of course. I hear you're quite the musician these days." Dad said nodding. Nick smiled and nodded.

"Yes, sir." Nick said smiling. God, he's cute. I smiled at him. I looked back to my dad.

"Um… well, I can't stay, but… I was wondering if you wanted to come to our concert tonight in town? We could… catch up." I said quietly. Dad smiled widely and nodded.

"I can't wait."

"Cool. Here," I handed him a backstage pass and smiled. "You'll need this." He nodded. I hugged him gently, before walking back to the car. I waved at him and smiled. Nick snaked his arm around my waist and smiled at me.

"See?" He said quietly. He kissed me on the cheek. I blushed and looked to him.

"Yeah." I said quietly.

"Hey, Lils."

"What, Nick?"

"I missed you when you left."


	13. Help!

Hey, guys.

I don't know what's going on with my whole writting deal. I'm probably just gonna try to continue as best I can with what I have.

**I'm looking for a writing partner to share this account with. **

No joke, I'm serious. I can't handle all of the stories by myself, and I'd love to write with someone again, because I've got so much work to do.

If you've got your own account, that's cool, it doesn't matter. Just send me a link to some writing, and I'll get back to you.

I'm sort of desprate. Please, please, anyone.

PM me, or Email me at

I'm kind of on stand still at the moment.

I'm not gonna update for a week or two, then I might start again if someone starts writing with me...ok?

Sorry this isn't an update, but I really needed to get this out!

Love you guys,

Emilie


	14. Letters, Real Chapter!

If another story of mine gets deleted, I'm leaving, but here's two updates.

I've been very very busy lately, and the whole thing with Jonas fics around here. Bleh, whatevs.

Here's some interesting Nilly fluff.

-Emilie

* * *

Nick's POV.

Joe, Kevin and I walked onto Lilly and Miley's bus to hang. We didn't have a show for a few days, and we were going to be spending some time around New Jersey for the time. Unfortunately, we were to sleep in our buses for the first night because of a Harry Potter convention that was going on, taking up all of the hotel rooms until tomorrow night. I wanted to go with Lilly, but when I asked to go my parents laughed at us. Miley was sitting on the couch watching TV, her wig sitting on the table lazily, obviously she'd just taken it off. Lilly was nowhere in sight. Miley looked to us and smiled.

"Oh, hey." She said quietly.

"Sleepover dance-movie party?!" Joe asked excitedly. Miley laughed and nodded, standing up and shutting off the TV.

"Where's Lilly?" I asked. Miley rolled her eyes at me and pointed to the bunks. I nodded and walked back. I pushed open the curtain of her bunk and grinned, and it was that super creepy grin I developed after we saw _The Dark Knight_ a few days ago. She rolled my eyes and shook her head. I rested my elbows on the edge of my bunk and looked at her.

"We're gonna watch a movie. Care to join us?" I asked. She shook her head and nodded to the thick red notebook she was writing in.

"I'm writing."

I was now interested.

I smiled and guestured for her to come down to the back of the bus. She sighed, then followed me. We both sat on the couch and she showed me the outside of it.

"What are you writing? Songs?"

"No. Letters." She said quietly. She shrugged.

"To who?" I asked. She fell silent, then looked up at me and bit her lip.

There was a long pause.

"You." She said sheepishly.

"What?" I asked, confused.

"Its complicated."

"I'm a intricate man, Lilly. Try me." I said, leaning back, putting my arms behind my head, smirking. She raised one eyebrow at me. I recoiled and smiled. "Please?" She sighed again and nodded.

"Um… so, my mom got a notebook for me when I was 11, in a weird little shop that we found in Arizona the week we drove to Malibu. When we moved, you know?" She explained. I nodded, saying that I got it, and to continue. "And she told me that I could use it to write to you guys. Well, you, my dad, Maya, Mandy, Tiff, and everyone. For letters. And, so, I did. I wrote letters. Loads of 'em. Mostly to you three, but, yeah. But, see, I never sent them."

"Why?" I asked, a little annoyed, but hiding it, and very confused. I wasn't hiding the confusion very well.

"I don't know. I just… I didn't want you to think that I couldn't handle being anywhere without you guys. I didn't want you to worry about me." She said quietly, looking down at the book. I looked at it and cocked my head. It was really thick, possibly more than 600 pages, and Lilly's pen was set at one of the last pages. It was all written in.

"How many letters did you write, Lilly?"

"Um… a lot. This is actually the third book." She explained quietly. My jaw dropped slightly and I stared at her in disbelief. "The first year was the worse. I think I wrote every day. Then the second year, not so much, because I was kind of, changing, the third year, a little less, but still a load of letters. Fourth year was about the same as the second, and this year, well, many more." She said quietly. I looked at the worn book in her hands.

"Can… can I read them?" I asked. Her head shot up to me and her eyes widened.

"Oh..,um… they aren't really… I mean, its a lot of rambling and…"

"Please?" I asked. "Do you have the other books?" She looked at the book, then nodded silently. She got up and went to one of her bags. She pulled out two notebooks, both equally as thick as the red one. The first was a beaded leather one, the second a bright green hardback. She held them to her chest and sighed. I smiled and grabbed the red one. I stood up and pulled her into the front of the bus. Joe, Miley and Kevin were already sitting on the couch, bickering over the movie choice. She and I sat down, the rest of them slightly ignoring us. I pulled Lilly close to me. She pulled up her feet and then grabbed the blanket that was on the ground, quickly wrapping it around us. Thankfully, the bus was parked, and at its largest extension. I pulled my legs up on the couch, and Lilly followed suit. Kevin took a seat on the opposite couch, Miley then taking one next to him. Joe put in a movie, _V For Vendetta_, and sat down on the ground. Lilly handed me the leather book and smiled weakly. I nodded, and she nodded back. She lay back and watched the movie. I opened the book to the first page, and saw Lilly's cursive writing from when she was around 11.

**I began reading.**

**--**

August 29th, 2004

Dear Nicholas, Kevin, and Joseph Jonas,

Hey. I miss you so much. God, I'm so lame, but, I really do miss you guys already. I'm writing to you from a highway in Arizona. Yes, Joey. Arizona. I haven't actually made it to wherever we're going yet, but I really hope that this can not be awful. I think that I will not see you guys for a while makes it hard enough, but I really just have to be optimistic. I hope I'll find someone in the place where we're going. I still don't know. I don't think my mom does either. We're going west at the moment. At first, we were heading to the north, like, I don't know, maybe Seattle, but we've headed south after that.

I am getting very tired of being in a car. My mom hasn't spoken a word to me, and I don't want to talk to her. I hate her for doing this to me. For taking me away from my entire life. From you guys.

I think I should end this letter around now. We're stopping for food. Maybe they'll have something yummy here that I can eat. The last place only had some weird Indian food that was way to spicy.

I love you guys so much, and I miss you like crazy.

Love,

Lilly who is trying to be optimistic

--

August 31st 2004.

Dear Nicholas Jerry, Paul Kevin and Joseph Adam

Look, I used your middle names!

I miss you guys.

We're finally here. Mom bought a house today, and we're moving in tomorrow. It feels like its happening very fast, but, well. Yeah. We're living in Malibu. Its near L.A. Its very sunny here. When I asked why it was so hot and sunny to the man who sold my mom our house and he laughed and told me that it never rains in southern California.

I don't know if I'm going to like this place.

I mean, me? Without rain? I'll die.

I saw a whole lot of people outside playing and being weird. I think people here are much more different than people at home.

I hope they like me.

I didn't send the last letter. I don't really know why. I think I might send this one, and the last soon.

I miss you so much, I love you three very much.

Love,

Lilly who is hoping that people like her

--

I read them through, until I came to one that was upsetting.

--

September 3rd, 2004

Dear Nicholas, Kevin and Joseph (aka, The only people who care about my existence.)

I hate California with all my existence.

I started middle school today, and I hated it. I wore normal clothes. Magenta tights, blue skirt, white t-shirt and a black vest. My hair was down and straight, and I was of course, in atashi. I thought I looked very nice.

Everyone made fun of me. They all pointed and laughed. These two girls, both of their names started with A (Ashley or something), made mean jokes about me. I didn't even do anything to them! Why would they want to hurt me? Why would they want to hurt kitten?

The teachers gave me strange looks and told me that I wasn't allowed to wear my atashi. I told them it was a cultural thing, and it confused them, so they'll let me, but, honestly. And when I got really upset, I started speaking in Japanese, you know, like I always do, and nobody understood me, and then they called my mom and I had to sit in the counselors office for the last hour.

People here act like being different is a bad thing. Everyone here is the same. Everyone wears the same clothes and does their hair the same and talks the same. Uhg!

I hate this and I want to go home. At least in at home people were nice about me. They were all 'oh, that's cool, but sorta weird…'. Now people act like I'm some kind of freak.

I miss you guys even more now. Nicholas, I miss your hair. Joseph, I wish you could make me laugh right now. Kevin, I really could use a hug.

Waahhhh.

I miss you, I love you so much.

Love,

Lilly who hates California

--

September 4th, 2004

Dear Nicholas, Joseph and Kevin,

I miss you still.

Today, I regret to inform you that I don't have much better news.

I did sort of make a friend. Today, I didn't wear my atashi. I hoped that maybe I would make at least one friend, then I could wear it again. I went to school, and I met a boy named Oliver. His locker is next to mine. (Isn't that cool? They have lockers! It makes me feel so grown up!) I could not open my locker, and he helped me. Oliver is very good at opening stuck lockers. He is also very dorky like Nicholas is sometimes. He has brown hair. It reminds me of you guys, except his is very straight. He also has brown eyes like you guys. I think he generally reminds me of you guys. I think that might be why I felt better with him. He said he had been absent on my first day. He did not see my atashi. I think that I'll wait a while to wear it again. I don't want to scare him away.

I miss you so much, and I love you three very much.

Love,

Lilly who maybe has a new friend

--

The letters grew more and more depressing. Oliver seemed to help her from falling hard, but she still wrote feelings that I'd never felt. Such anger and sadness that almost hurt me.

The letters explained to me exactly what Lilly went through for four years. When Oliver taught her to skate board, the day she stopped wearing skirts, when Miley first moved into town, when Miley told her the Hannah Secret, when Lilly was first discovered (back in 2006), Lilly's first concert, when Miley's dad and her mom first went out on a date, when they got married, Stories and stories about her, Miley and Oliver's adventures. Some were hard to read. Some were funny. Some that showed that my Lilly, Riri-chan, was still in there. No matter how deep.

I was near the end of the third book when I started to get tired. I sighed and looked around. Miley was gone, Kevin was asleep on the couch and Joe was passed out on the floor near the TV. Lilly was asleep, snug against my chest. I smiled and sighed. I would have just to sleep holding her there if the couch wasn't so awfully uncomfortable. I would put Lilly in her bunk and go to the back. The back is always more comfortable.

I shifted a little and pulled Lilly up a smidge.

"Mhmmmm." She murmured. Her eyes opened slightly and she looked to me. She nodded and closed her eyes again. I shook her gently and she opened her eyes a little wider. "Mmm?"

"I think you should be in your bunk. You'll be more comfortable." I said quietly. She moaned slightly and shook her head. I sighed and wrapped my arms around her, pulling her into my arms. I hoisted her up, and I walked slowly to the bunks. I gently lifted her to the middle bunk, pulling her blankets over her. I turned to the back, but she grabbed my hand.

"No, Nicholas, stay…" She murmered, half asleep. Her voice was calm, and soft. I sighed.

"Sleep." I reassured. "I'll see you in the morning, Lils."

"Stay, kudasai… Nicholas, kudasai." She begged. She sounded exactly like she used to. She would beg me to stay with her, and she always pleaded like this. I melted, and nodded to her, giving her hand a soft squeeze before letting go. I climbed over her and lay down near the wall of the bunk. Fortunatly, Lilly and I were both smaller than the rest of our friends, even though she was four inches smaller than I, and a whole lot skinnier, we were small, so we both fit comfortably. Even with the extra room, she instantly held close to me. We probably could have fit another person in the bunk, and I wouldn't have been surprised.

"Arigato, Nicholas." She thanked

"Doitashimashite." I whispered back, as it really felt nice to be with her anyway.

"Aishiteru." She said in a hushed, loving voice, before falling asleep. I smiled and pulled her closer. I kissed the top of her head and smiled.

"I love you, too, Lilly.

--

* * *

Riri is how you say Lilly (the name) in Japanese.

Review please.


End file.
